As a clinical psychologist, I am intimately familiar with the challenges and anxieties that both children and parents face during transitions in the school year. For some families starting school holidays is hard; working out what to do to keep the children busy, healthy, and happy for two or so weeks. For other families, stopping all the fun and ‘returning to the real world’ is a tough transition that most children don’t want to take. For other families there is just little joy at any transition, let alone the return transition. Returning to school after a break can be particularly stressful, especially when a child feels out of sync with the academic and social demands of school life.
In this post, I will offer a comprehensive guide for parents who are supporting children struggling with the midyear return to school. This may also be helpful if school has already recommenced and there is still some lingering anxiety, hesitation, or inability to get into a rhythm with school.
Through the stories of “Lucas” in primary school and “Emily” in high school, I will illustrate practical strategies grounded in psychological principles that can help ease this transition. As always, these Avatars represent common presentations I have worked with over the years but are not any specific individual.
Understanding the Emotional Landscape
First, it’s crucial to understand that children of different ages will express stress differently. Younger children, like Lucas, may show more overt signs such as clinginess or tantrums, while teenagers, like Emily, might withdraw or exhibit irritability. Recognising these signs early can help you intervene effectively.
Lucas: The Primary School Journey
Lucas, a usually cheerful third-grader, began showing signs of anxiety and resistance about returning to school. His parents noticed his subdued mood and reluctance to talk about school, and no longer shares the exciting things he has been learning and doing which was uncharacteristic.
Academic Engagement: Knowing that part of Lucas’s anxiety stemmed from feeling behind, his parents arranged a meeting with his teacher early on to discuss his academic standing and what support the school could offer. His teacher provided reassurance and tailored resources to help Lucas catch up gradually.
Emotional Support: Lucas’s parents maintained an open dialogue about his feelings, making it clear that it was okay to feel nervous. They introduced fun, stress-reducing activities that Lucas could look forward to after school, which helped him associate positive experiences with his school days.
Routine Reinforcement: They worked with Lucas to establish a comforting morning routine, incorporating his interests, like reading a page from his favourite dinosaur book each morning, which provided a consistent, enjoyable and stress-free start to his day.
Building Social Confidence: To address his social worries, Lucas’s parents coordinated playdates with a small group of classmates over the weekend, fostering stronger friendships that made school feel more welcoming.
Emily: The High School Transition
Emily, in year 10, was feeling weighed down with academic pressure and social dynamics that made her dread going to school. Her parents were concerned about her increasing withdrawal and gradual increase in outbursts.
Structured Academic Support: Emily and her parents met with her teachers to outline a clear academic plan, which included extra help sessions and manageable weekly goals to prevent her from feeling overwhelmed.
Enhanced Emotional Dialogue: Regular, informal check-ins allowed Emily to express her concerns in a low-pressure setting. Her parents encouraged her to use art as a medium to explore and communicate her feelings, which Emily found therapeutic.
Balanced Routine: Together, they restructured her daily schedule to include dedicated time for studies and relaxation activities such as yoga, which they sometimes did together to strengthen their bond.
Social Engagement: Emily was hesitant to join new activities, but with gentle encouragement, she attended a few club meetings. Finding a photography club where she felt valued and could express herself creatively made a significant difference in her social well-being.
Professional Resources: Noticing signs of persistent stress, Emily’s parents consulted with a school counselor to provide Emily with additional coping strategies and professional support, reinforcing that seeking help was a sign of strength, not weakness.
Conclusion: Empowering Parents and Children
Both Lucas and Emily’s stories highlight the importance of parental involvement and the need for tailored emotional and academic strategies. For parents supporting struggling children, the key is open communication, consistent support, and knowing when to seek additional resources. By addressing both emotional and practical needs, parents can help their children navigate midyear transitions successfully, not just by surviving but by thriving.
Parents, remember that your support plays a critical role in your child’s ability to face school challenges with resilience. Celebrate every small victory along the way, and know that with patience and understanding, your child can overcome the hurdles of returning to maintaining school attendance and performance can throw at them.
